It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
