Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
