I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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