He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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