i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
His nipple licking is glorious
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