What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
i now understand why vodka
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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