At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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