shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Can i not drive my cunt home
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
