Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
