Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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