Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
