i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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