bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
