i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
