You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
This can only be settled by a dance off.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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