Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
