the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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