I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Randomize
