my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
