i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
why do cheetos always look like penises
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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