rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Naked. naked and bneed help.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
