nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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