Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
