So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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