He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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