Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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