i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
