Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize