in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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