hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
You peed on a flamingo?!?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
