she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
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Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
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Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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