I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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