I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
