i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize