this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
