so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
love makes seman taste better
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize