Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Randomize
