let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
