it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
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i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I'd cum for enchiladas.
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The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here