Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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