Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
