all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
