Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
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No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
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Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?