I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
