hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
