He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
