oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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