why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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