And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Well I just put wine in my tea
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
