i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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